Curses, foiled again
Boston police reported that a man walked into a bank and handed a teller a note that read, “Give me all your money.” The teller refused, informing the would-be robber the window was closed. He moved over to the next teller, where a customer scolded him for cutting in front of the line. When the second teller and a customer in line told the man he’d have to take off his sweatshirt hood, the suspect refused and left empty-handed. (The Boston Globe) Police concluded that Darin E. Moore, 49, smashed a window with his hand so he could break into a groundfloor apartment in Columbus, Ohio, but the broken glass severed an artery in his arm, and he bled to death. (The Columbus Dispatch)
Second-Amendment follies
Alfonsia O’Bryant, 85, was trying to remove an opossum that had gotten into a chicken pen in Augusta, Ga., when his friend fired a .32-caliber pistol at the animal. Richmond County sheriff’s officials said the bullet missed the opossum but wounded O’Bryant in the face. (The Augusta Chronicle) Police in Louisville, Ky., reported that John Berthiaume, 53, seriously injured his right arm, buttock and leg when his homemade potato gun exploded. Tony Berthiaume said his brother apparently put too much black powder into the gun. (Louisville’s WLKY-TV)
Fatastic news
Plastic surgeon Dr. Jeffrey Hartog announced the opening of a fat bank in Seminole County, Fla., where patients who’ve had fat removed during liposuction can store it for future cosmetic use, such as plumping up body parts affected by aging. The service spares the patient having to undergo liposuction, which requires anesthesia, a second or third time to obtain the fat. “Fat banking takes [liposuction] to a whole new level,” Hartog said. “We put the patient to sleep once. Do the lipo. Get the fat out once and have as much as we need for later injections.” He explained the fat is drained, cleaned, put in containers for freezing by a “patented process” and stored at his Liquid Gold center, located next to his cosmetic-surgery clinic. The cost to store 250 to 300 cubic centimeters of fat — enough to fill a coffee cup — is $900 for the first year and $200 every year after that. (Orlando Sentinel)
Friends indeed
After Cumberland County, Pa., District Judge Thomas A. Placey ordered a continuance for Barry Horn Jr., who’s accused in a standoff with police, several court observers Googled Placey’s Facebook page and learned he’s a Facebook friend with the defendant. Placey said he knew Horn’s father, a former county sheriff’s deputy, but has never socialized with the defendant. He insisted the two aren’t real friends, only Facebook friends, adding that he accepts every friend request he gets. “Someone says you want to be my friend, I say ‘yes’,” Placey said. “You could be a Facebook friend of mine, I wouldn’t know it.” (Harrisburg’s The Patriot-News)
Compiled from the nation’s press by Roland Sweet. Authentication on demand.
