Just a thought … no man is really successful until his motherin-law admits it.

Pity the poor barber who cuts hair all day then goes home and has to mow the lawn.

A fundraiser is a person who spends his time urging you to spend your money.

Pause and remember … We should bless all lawyers. Who else would get us out of the trouble they got us into?

Overheard … “I remember when things were so bad they started cutting the wages of sin.”

Lotsa husbands complain, “My wife is as pretty as she used to be … it just takes longer now.”

Most girls today are attracted to the man who is tall, dark and has some.

Real headline: “Reasons for increase in births among teens remains unclear” – The Washington Post

While your daughter is growing up, remember these are the most popular girls … the experimental, the sentimental and the ornamental.

Remember, if you want to be quoted, say something you shouldn’t say.