Curses, foiled again
A man who snatched a wallet from a woman shopping with three friends at a market in Santa Rosa, Calif., tried to make his getaway on a bicycle, but the victim heaved a 12-pack of Miller Lite beer bottles at him when he was maybe 12 feet away. She hit him, knocking him to the ground, where all four women “were on him like kids on a burst piñata,” according to the Press Democrat. After the victim got back her wallet, the women let the man go but kept his bicycle.

When guns are outlawed
Franziska Stegbauer, 77, suffered a fatal stab wound while trying to break up a sword fight between her grandson and brother-inlaw. Both men were hospitalized, and the brother-in-law, Adolf Stegbauer, 69, later died from his wounds. The Indianapolis Star reported that the Marion County prosecutor, who charged the grandson, Christopher Rondeau, 37, with murder and reckless homicide, said the men had been drinking when Adolf Stegbauer “went from a happy drunk to a mean drunk.” Stegbauer grabbed a samurai-type sword, knocked Franziska Stegbauer down and stabbed Rondeau, who told investigators he got a Japanese saberstyle infantry sword from another room, “parried a few times and hit Adolf at least two times.”

Criminal haberdashery
Police arrested the groom at his own wedding reception for disturbing the peace because his nephew was wearing saggy pants. The Times-Picayune reported the incident began when a police officer working security at the reception at the Crystal Plantation in Kenner, La., told Samuel Lucas, 19, to pull up his pants to comply with the reception hall’s dress code. According to the police report, the boy’s father, Walter Lucas, 52, told the officer to mind his own business and began arguing. While the officer was trying to escort the father outside, the groom, John Lucas, 53, got involved. The officer called for backup, and all three were arrested. “All the kid had to do,” Crystal Plantation owner Leonard Dazet told the newspaper, “was pull up his pants.”

Store-policy follies
After a Wal-Mart store in Manatee County, Fla., refused to allow Phillip R. Wright, 41, to return several items, authorities said he retaliated by setting fire to three racks of clothes. The Bradenton Herald reported that store officials quickly evacuated the store and extinguished the blaze. Wright was arrested two hours later at another Wal-Mart trying to exchange a few boxes of water filters, several flavored water filter packets and a greeting card.

Compiled from the nation’s press by Roland Sweet. Submit items, citing date and source, to P.O. Box 8130, Alexandria VA 22306.