FOOD | Julianne Glatz

It’s a tough job, but somebody’s got to do it. Not long after I began writing this column in 2006, I realized that the job came with a few perks. There were invitations to food writers’ dinners in some of Chicago’s best restaurants. Cookbooks began arriving in my mailbox. Some weren’t that great but, hey, they were free. One of the first and best perks was being asked to be a judge at the Old Capitol Blues and BBQs festival. Like longtime food writer for Vogue magazine and curmudgeonly Iron Chef judge Jeffrey Steingarten said about being asked to judge at the Memphis in May World Barbeque Competition, I figured it was “…no doubt in recompense for a noble deed I had committed in a former life.”

“How cool is this?” I thought, driving to my first judges’ training session, amused that such a meeting was even necessary. After all, how hard could it be? We’d eat a bunch of ribs and decide which ones we liked best. Just goes to show how much I knew.

The room was full of large, hearty men. I was the only woman judge, something that’s been true most years since. Everyone was good-natured and jovial, but it quickly became apparent that the majority were deadly serious about barbeque: veterans of multiple barbeque competitions, as judges, contestants, or both. I was handed a packet that contained a sample judging sheet and the rules and criteria, and started reading:

CRITERIA FOR RIB TURN IN SAM- PLES Entries are scored in areas of APPEAR- ANCE, TENDERNESS/TEXTURE and TASTE. The scoring system is from 9 (Excellent), 5 (Average), to 2 (Bad). All numbers between two and nine may be used to score an entry. A score of one (1) is a disqualification and requires approval by a Contest Rep. Each contestant MUST submit at least five (5) separated and identifiable portions of meat in a container. If meat is not presented in such a manner and the judge not having meat to taste, will judge the entry as one (1). This in no way will penalize the other contestants who have properly submitted their entry. Garnish is limited to chopped, sliced, shredded or whole leaves of green lettuce (no kale, endive or red lettuce) and/or curly parsley, flat leaf parsley or cilantro. Marking of any kind on the meat or container will not be tolerated. This will include but is not limited to painting, sculpting, or decorating. No aluminum foil or stuffing is allowed in the container. No toothpicks, skewers, foreign material or stuffing is permitted. Any entry not complying with this rule will be given a one (1) in APPEARANCE, a one (1) in TASTE, and a one (1) in TENDERNESS/TEXTURE. To simplify the judging process, no side sauce containers will be permitted in the meat judging containers. Meats may be presented with or without sauce as the contestant wishes. Any entry not complying with this rule will be given a one (1) on APPEARANCE.

That was just for the ribs. There were also similar numbering systems and different guidelines for the other categories: pulled pork and “other.”