Curses, foiled again

A woman who police said tried to rob two credit unions in Memphis, Tenn., fled empty-handed both times because tellers couldn’t figure out what she wanted. The first attempt ended with the frustrated robber throwing her holdup note at the teller and running away after the teller couldn’t understand her mumbling. A few hours later, a teller at the second credit union kept asking the woman fumbling in her purse what she wanted. Finally, she produced a note. When she also pulled a gun, the teller left. The woman ran outside, tripped and fell, dropped her gun, then got into a car and drove off. (The Commercial Appeal)

Alerted by neighbors that someone was breaking into their car, a couple in Lake City, Fla., used their entry remote control to lock the thief inside. “So every time he tried to get out of the car, the owners just kept hitting the lock button on their key fob, and eventually he gave up trying to get out,” Columbia County sheriff’s Sgt. Ed Seifert said after Travis James Neeley, 19, was arrested. (The Gainesville Sun)

Get ’em while they last

The Hump, a Japanese restaurant in Santa Monica, Calif., known for its exotic sushi, admitted serving whale meat after federal prosecutors filed a criminal complaint against the restaurant and its chef, Kiyoshiro Yamamoto. The action followed an investigation by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, the California Department of Fish and Game and the federal Customs and Border Protection agency, prompted by the team behind the Oscar-winning documentary about dolphin hunting, The Cove. “Someone should not be able to walk into a restaurant and order a plate of an endangered species,” U.S. attorney Andre Birotte Jr. said. (The New York Times)

Canada’s Parliament reacted to a European Union ban on seal products by serving seal hors d’oeuvres and main dishes at its restaurant. Two dozen lawmakers attended a luncheon to eat seal and listen to speeches endorsing Canada’s annual seal hunt. “This support begins on the plates of Canadians,” federal Fisheries Minister Gail Shea proclaimed while dining on medallions of doublesmoked, bacon wrap seal loin in a port reduction. (Reuters)

The last straw

Police in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., said Johnny Dossey, 43, reacted to a $70 water bill by dousing his mobile home with gasoline and then setting it on fire. A few minutes later, the home exploded. Neighbor Luis Alvarez, who said he heard Dossey arguing with his father about the bill, pointed out, “I guess he got fed up with it, and that’s the only way he saw out of it.” (Miami Herald)

Compiled from the nation’s press by Roland Sweet. Authentication on demand.